http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1036162/Is-adultery-gene-One-woman-traces-infidelity-patterns-shaped-life.html
In our lecture on infidelity the issue of how it effects the family and especially children who find out that one of their parents has been unfaithful to the other one was not even discussed, but as someone who has first hand experience of the devastation it can cause to the family would like this to be addressed, rather than just looking at the immediate victims.
I know of a 15 yr old girl who since she found out that her father has committed adultery, (for 2 years) detests him. She is happy to have no contact with her father, and instead lives with her step mother, who she perhaps sees as being innocent.
While I can see that adultery may only be a symptom of a bad marriage, that was probably on borrowed time in the first place, isn't infidelity just "having your cake, and eating it"?
If the adulterer had any respect for their partner, they should decide who it is they want to be with and then have the courage to be honest - but there lies the rub....infidelity by definition means not truthful..... the answer is in the question.
The Mistress, is no better, as if she had any morals she would walk away from it, as soon as she found out that her lover was married, and with children. Sorry, I am not interested in the "what about my happiness" cry.... Well you don't miss what you never had, so be man enough to think about all the people involved rather than just what you want.
In the end the one who really loses out in this scenario is the adulterer; he has his mistress, and an easy way out of his marriage, but has lost his children as part of the deal - clever boy.
So if young children involved do you tell them
1. that Daddy has a new girl friend, and this is perfectly acceptable behaviour and teaching them that marriage has no value OR
2. explain that Daddy has a new girlfriend, but this is not what should be done, and thus alienate father from his young child
....mmm a question that the perpetrators certainly never considered, because it was their happiness that was in the forefront of their mind.
Its not cut and dry, but before you start the journey, think about where or how it might end.
In our lecture on infidelity the issue of how it effects the family and especially children who find out that one of their parents has been unfaithful to the other one was not even discussed, but as someone who has first hand experience of the devastation it can cause to the family would like this to be addressed, rather than just looking at the immediate victims.
I know of a 15 yr old girl who since she found out that her father has committed adultery, (for 2 years) detests him. She is happy to have no contact with her father, and instead lives with her step mother, who she perhaps sees as being innocent.
While I can see that adultery may only be a symptom of a bad marriage, that was probably on borrowed time in the first place, isn't infidelity just "having your cake, and eating it"?
If the adulterer had any respect for their partner, they should decide who it is they want to be with and then have the courage to be honest - but there lies the rub....infidelity by definition means not truthful..... the answer is in the question.
The Mistress, is no better, as if she had any morals she would walk away from it, as soon as she found out that her lover was married, and with children. Sorry, I am not interested in the "what about my happiness" cry.... Well you don't miss what you never had, so be man enough to think about all the people involved rather than just what you want.
In the end the one who really loses out in this scenario is the adulterer; he has his mistress, and an easy way out of his marriage, but has lost his children as part of the deal - clever boy.
So if young children involved do you tell them
1. that Daddy has a new girl friend, and this is perfectly acceptable behaviour and teaching them that marriage has no value OR
2. explain that Daddy has a new girlfriend, but this is not what should be done, and thus alienate father from his young child
....mmm a question that the perpetrators certainly never considered, because it was their happiness that was in the forefront of their mind.
Its not cut and dry, but before you start the journey, think about where or how it might end.
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